*she squeezed her eyes shut, still facing the ground, and took a deep breath. She had no idea if she had done the right thing by telling him, or if she could trust him. But she couldn’t stop now* I-I’m not sure. *rubs her arm and looks off to the side, sniffling a bit, tears in her eyes now. She will not cry in front of this stranger.* I-I just know that after I managed to make her stop hurting others *sniff* i-it got worse. It was much more noticeable, more dangerous… She kept trying to find things sharper, things that would make her hurt more… *starts to shake, her voice trailing off at the memories, the flashbacks of all that blood*
*he wasn’t sure how to comfort her. Why was she telling him all of this anyways? He couldn’t dwell on that now…* ….she was very unstable. This was when you were sharing a body..? *he could hear her sniffling and hoped she wouldn’t cry. He didn’t know how to deal with crying people.* …. *he reached out, gingerly touching her shoulder* Hey. Don’t…it’s over now. I was probably because she needed an outlet..and somehow she found it very useful to use herself.
Y-yes she was. It was unexpected. *very slowly calming down, focusing on the floor to reduce the tears* And no, we’d been separated by that time. I even dyed my hair black, so you could tell us a-apart… *flinches at the touch, more surprised than anything, and looks up at him, eyes wide. He didn’t look or, at first, act like the comforting type. Where had this come from?* She’s much better now. I eventually got through to her. She credits me for saving her, but all I really did was talk some sense into her. *glances at your hand again,confused, before putting on a strained smile, looking up at you* Not so “useless” after all, huh?
…its not natural? *he lifts up a piece of your hair, letting it fall from his fingers* What color is it normally? *it was a casual question and his head tipped to the other side, trying to see her expression from the way her head was angled downward* …That keeps you apart from your Yami. That bond is still there, you know. *his hand dropped back to his side. It was annoying how he was, once again, trying to comfort someone. That wasn’t like him. At all* Good. Its quite pathetic for a Yami to lose control of themselves—that’s the hikari’s job. Not the other way around. *he smirks a little, looking down at you* no. Maybe not so much after all.
No. It’s actually white. *stiffens when you touch her hair, still slightly confused. She had expected him to be rough, from her first impression, but he was… surprisingly gentle. She kind of… liked it.* I know the bond is there, and We’ll never truly be apart. I care for Kirasa- I wouldn’t want that, anyway. It’s just that it was starting to confuse people. People thought I was her, and treated me as such, which was fine. B-but I didn’t want people to think she was me… So I dyed it. Besides, I was afraid of being made fun of here. *laughs a little and touches the end of your hair* Though I guess that was never a problem. *Looks up at you and frowns a bit, removing her hand* Everyone is allowed to loose control sometimes. What matters is having someone to bring you back. *smirks back, not being bothered by having to look up* And I’m glad you changed your mind.
Like mine? *pushes his hand back from over his shoulders* That’s right, you never will be—but it was a nice attempt. I’ll give you that. No, no, that is entirely understandable. People merely see what is on the outside and never actually look. I’m sure if you stood right next to her, I could find several ways you two were not alike. *scowls* Maybe. Sometimes you have to be the one to do that, though. No one will be there for you all the time. You have to learn how to depend on yourself rather than someone else to lift you to your feet every time you fall. Mm, well after hearing that I guess you were worthy of it, don’t you think?
Our personalities are completely different, but people got us confused at first glance too often for it to be comfortable. *shrugs* And I never said you have to constantly be taken care of. Believe me, I know what it’s like to be let down. But Kirasa and I have a very give-and-take relationship. It’s very much 50-50. We have no intention of letting each other down, and it’s staying that way, even if for no other reason than the bond and the fact that we owe each other our lives. *Looks extremely surprised* I… I havn’t done anything particularly extraordinary. Frankly, I thought you’d be harder to impress. *smiles at you, genuinely happy* I guess I was wrong about you…
Ah— but like I said. People always look quickly and make judgements without really seeing the obvious telltale signs of difference. ….I can’t relate to that. I have no idea what its like but if it works out for you, fantastic. *rolls his eyes, disgruntled by your happiness* No. Whatever you’re thinking is probably correct. I am hard to impress and I wasn’t impressed, I was merely giving you the credit you believe you deserve.
*sighs* If people were more perceptive, life would have been a lot easier. It does work out, and frankly, I’m sorry if you and your hikari are not the same way. IT really does help, sometimes. *realizes something, frowning* What’s he like, anyway? You havn’t talked about him at all. *rolls her eyes, smirking at you* Right. Of course. I already said I don’t think I deserve credit. And unless you think I do… why would you say so? *stares at him, completely curious, not sure what to make of him.*
Nope. *shakes his head* Don’t be. It doesn’t matter and it doesn’t entirely concern you either. Hm? *raises his hand, rubbing the back of his head, pulling a few tangles out* You never really asked. I figured it didn’t matter…. he’s weak. He looks like me quite a bit. He has a sense of compassion most humans don’t have and he has a strong mind—which makes it hard to control. He doesn’t like to listen to me but I know how to make him submit. He’s just…Ryou. *purses his lips slightly* …You managed to do what is nearly impossible. Calm a Yami down, didn’t you not? I’ve one seen that happen in one other person, but he never had a bad other half to start with.
I guess not. *thinks for a second* Actually, I think I’ve met him. Smart guy. Nice. He was pretty welcoming. He said- *looks at you intently, then decides against telling him what Ryou told her* uh… some stuff. *raises an eyebrow at the submit comment, but lets it go* I… I did, yes. *looks away, uneasily* It wasn’t simple. She’s quite hard-headed, but she’s not bad. She just… has a temper.
*narrows his eyes, wondering what you were going to say but decides to let it go* That’s wonderful you think so highly of my host. *his voice dripped with sarcasm, smirking at your reaction* Of course not, its never simple with us. I’m just curious of why you tried so hard—and how you made it possible to break through her.
I think highly of everyone, until they prove to me they’re not worth it. It’s kind of a problem sometimes. *sighs, exasperated* I tried because I didn’t want to loose her… she’s important to me. And it was easy, when I figured out what to do. *smirks rather deviously, looking him in the eye* I walked in on her cutting herself one day, and told her she was being weak. Pathetic. Finding an easy way out, instead of fighting it on her own terms, without such a shameful outlet. That only a true loser couldn’t deal with loosing. I was totally ruthless, and I felt horrible… But it had to be done. She hasn’t done it since.
(via theringspirit-deactivated201206)
(1 year ago)
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